While most guys are trying to white-knuckle their way out of porn, I’m teaching a completely different approach.
Instead of fighting urges with willpower alone, I help men strip the drama out of their recovery. They learn to see their addiction, urges, and setbacks for what they actually are without all the catastrophic thinking that keeps them stuck in cycles.
It’s, I looked at porn and masturbated, what can I learn from this?, instead of I screwed up, I lost my streak, my life is over and I’m permanently broken for life #hopeless.
I’m not teaching them to ignore their emotions or be emotionless because learning how to feel your emotions better is ⅓ of the journey.
Freedom = 1. Thoughts & mindset, 2. feelings & emotions, 3. values & spirituality.
I’m teaching them how to look at addiction, urges, relapses and all parts of this factually and with common sense.
I’m teaching them how to find the real triggers (stress, boredom, anxiety, etc) and pull out the real story vs the fictional one going on in their minds.
It’s the fictional stories that are so charged in emotion that it leads you into the land of pain.
When you learn how to do this, everything changes. You get to decide what things mean and how you want to handle them.
You’re in a better mindset to actually work the problem vs have a panic attack because you think you can never get free.
Mindset is EVERYTHING! It’s more important than streaks, dopamine, keeping yourself busy etc.
Because everything starts in the mind (mindset). Every urge, action and in-action, every relapse is driven / triggered by what’s going on in your head.
Learning how to corral that, is what gets you free.
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I used to think shame would always control me, but once I learned how to turn it into strength, everything changed.
Join me on September 17, 2025, I’m hosting the Shame to Strength Webinar, and I want to guide you through that same transformation
https://mattsmithcoaching.com/from-shame-to-strength/
